Freesize and Fabulous

I’ve always been unapologetic for who I am. This includes my attitude, my stride, my style, and my appearances. Most of the time I’m in sweats and every now and then, my fashionista comes out. Despite coming from an asian family (cause you all know that we get fat-shamed constantly), I have learned to love who I am. Sure there are those days where I wish I was a size 2 or 4, but I’m not. I’m a curvy 8 and sometimes 10 when I decide to eat a churro.

So this is the ugly truth…. when I was younger I was bulimic. But it’s totally not what you think. I loved food so much that I would over eat and run around and then throw up. Yea. I live a glamorous lifestyle. When I finally learned to hold down my food and slightly pace myself, I gained weight. But it was tennis that really kept me at bay. I was playing 4-5 hours everyday so I was able to eat whatever I wanted. Still at a lean and toned 120lb, I was fat-shamed.

Then came off season. When college was starting and there wasn’t any time for tennis anymore. The freshman 15 was real, but it wasn’t getting in the way of anything. I fluctuated in being active and not active.

Food is kind of the most awesome thing ever. There are millions of combinations of food already made and a million more waiting for me to eat them. I have a long life to live and I’m excited to eat it all!

Fast forward to today. I know my body and I know my style. I never try on clothes.

  1. It is so annoying to change and unchange and rechange.
  2. It wastes my time

It almost always works for me. The outliars come once in a blue moon.

So Vietnam has been a fat-shaming extravaganza. I get it…. I’m bigger than the normal viet chick. The women here are literally the size of my thigh. I will retailiate that at least my breasts are 3 times bigger. YAY WINNING. I have a smaller waist than I let on so I love dresses. Now whenever I go into a stall to look at a dress, you would think that the ladies would shut the hell up and let me mistakenly buy a dress that they think is too small for me so that they can make a profit, but as soon as they open their mouth… I’m out.

The list of things that have been said to me, Bare in mind that in Asia, a large = small in US:

  1. You too big for freesize.
  2. Freesize is one size fits all (which is usually a medium in the US)… not you.
  3. No size fit you.
  4. Who you buying for? You? No size fit you.
  5. You too fat.
  6. We have your larger size over here.

The best part is that I don’t really look viet, so when these ladies speak among themselves in viet… that’s when I clap back with my fluent viet and tell them that I understand what they’re saying. Shuts them up everytime.

What I don’t understand is why they would say this to me or anybody for that fact. If they literally didn’t say anything to me, they might have made a sale. There have been so many times that I picked up piles of clothes and when they come up to me and say, oh this is for you? This won’t fit… I literally drop everything and leave without saying a word.

I’m not giving my business to fat-shamers.  

This one stall, I was about to drop $100. Fun fact: the average monthly salary in Vietnam is $148…. They literally could have gone off with a big sale and be set for the month, but instead, they opened their mouth and told me I’m too fat for their clothes. I could have been buying for a friend, which I was doing on multiple occasions… so sorry friends, no zara rejected clothes for you!

It was super humiliating and demoralizing a few days ago, but that quickly turned into rage and anger. I don’t have to be stick skinny to be beautiful. I don’t have to fit a beauty standard that’s prescribed by the patriarch to feel good about myself.

All I have to say to those people is:

You do you. Cause I’mma do me.